In this second part of my Simple Rules for Influence, I want to focus on three rules that will help you to get ready to go out there and influence.
Aim for Wanting or Willing
The first one is about your orientation and your overriding objective, what you’re trying to do here. I’m not talking about the specific influence that you want, but what I want to guide you to do is to get people to want to do what you want them to do, or at least be willing to do it.
Now, most of us are grown-up enough to know that we can’t always have what we want. If we understand why a request is being made of us, we understand the context to it, we’ll do an awful lot that we don’t want to do because we recognise that we need to get on and do it. And so, we are willing to go and help other people, to put ourselves out, to commit resources.
As an influencer recognise this and aim that really you want people who are committed (that want to do what you want them to do) and if you can’t have that, at least get people who are willing to do it.
Then you start to avoid people being compelled, people having to be compliant, people being forced, backed into a corner. Because if that is the case, and you’ve got influence through those means, it can very quickly unravel. As soon as you turn your back, they’ll go back to doing what they used to do. So, please, always aim to get people to want to do what you want them to do or at least be willing.
Prepare for Transparency
The second rule here is about preparing yourself to be as transparent as you possibly can be.
This means being open about the drawbacks to your proposition or what you want them to do, because there will be drawbacks, and if you don’t tell them, they’ll go and find out, imagine or fantasise about them for themselves. So best that you put your cards on the table.
Also be prepared to be transparent about what you’re getting from the transaction, because it is a question that will definitely be in their mind, “Why’s he asking for this? What’s in it for him? What’s he trying to get here?” And if you don’t tell them, again, they’ll go and fantasise about it or maybe they’ll refer to other people that will be less convenient for you. Better they hear it from you.
But you have got to be diligent with transparency. You have got to be careful because, you know, in this world, we can’t just share everything. We’ve got to be judicious about what we’re sharing, so get ready to be as transparent as you possibly can. Design this into to your influence approach.
Keep It Simple
And the third rule in this is about whatever your strategy is, whatever you’re trying to achieve and your plan is, try to keep it as simple as possible. Keep your strategy, your stepping-stones as simple as possible.
Then they will be much more memorable to you. You’re much likely to recall what it is you’re supposed to be doing, what steps you’re going to be taking, rather than it getting very convoluted.
Also try to keep your ask of other people as simple as possible because they’ve got a lot else on. They’ve got a lot of other things to think about, so if you can just give a very simple, lucid, one-pager, couple of sentences in terms of what you want, the easier it is for them to understand. Not because they’re stupid, but because they’re busy, the simpler it is for them to understand, the more likely they will be to say yes.
If you’ve been very clear about what it is you want, why you want it, it can be a very straightforward influence attempt.
These are three rules to help you get ready to go and do your influencing.
Colin Gautrey
Provocative Coach/Mentor | Specialism: Impact and Influence
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