Influence by force is common, especially in the workplace. You may be thinking that it is odious and should not form a part of your influencing approach. Yet, used in the right way, and in the right circumstances, it can dramatically accelerate your progress.
The purpose of this article is to make you stop and think for a moment. I’d like you to recognise the potential, think about the pros and cons, and then learn how to make careful and shrewd choices about your choice of influencing tactic.
Let’s start with the reasons why you should at least consider using a little more force in your influence attempts.
Advantages of Using Force
- Speed. Applying pressure and using more assertive behaviour gets things done more quickly. When time is in short supply and you need to move quickly to action, applying a little force may well be the right thing to do.
- Disputes. Sometimes, teams can descend into endless arguments. If the power is evenly balanced between the opponents, a stalemate can ensue. When you notice this happening, force may be the only solution. Use your power to make a clear decision and then drive it through. Good for the team, and good for you.
- Cultural norm. If you are inhabiting a place where a lot of force is being used, avoiding the use of that tactic yourself is likely to put you at a significant disadvantage. One of the reasons is that people are accustomed to being forced to do things and may not respect alternative approaches which are seen as being weak. When in Rome … However, take care that you follow the guidance below.
- Positional expectations. I’ve coached many who have the mistaken notion that people want to be led by consensus. People generally respect decisive leaders. Decisiveness, by its nature, means that some people are going to be disagreeing with it, and need to be forced into acceptance.
- Last resort. Regardless of how proficient you are at developing your case, communicating it and persuading people to buy-in, there will be times when all of that fails. If you have the power to do it, you should seriously consider applying a little force.
Now, before you get carried away and start forcing everything through, here are some of the reasons why you should moderate your use of force when influencing.
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Disadvantages of Using Force
- Relationship strain. Most of the time, when force is applied, it is to get someone to do something they don’t want to do. How do you feel when you are forced to do something?
- Downstream trouble. Those who have been compelled into doing something are likely to revert back or unravel the progress made as soon as the force weakens or turns its back.
- Diminished results. Most people who are forced into doing something will do the minimum that they have to in order to comply. Innovation and goodwill evaporate as force is applied.
- Reduced challenge. People who are told what to do may also decide not to bother challenging the edict. This could reduce the quality of the decision and the end result.
- Risk of confrontation. On the other hand, they could decide to tackle you directly with lots of emotion and passion. Are you ready for that?
- Exciting enemies. The more you force people to do things, the more carefully they will watch for opportunities to unseat you. If you’re not careful, they may even begin to collude behind your back.
- Reputational risk. If you are known for forcing people to do things, it may help you to become more influential. However, when used excessively, it can be perceived as ruling by fear. That means people will start to avoid you, and your pool of goodwill will vanish quickly.
- Increased politicking. Most people who find themselves blocked in doing what they want to do will search hard for alternative ways of doing it. Rather than challenge or confront openly, opposition may go underground, and who knows where that may lead?
- Trust erosion. Fundamentally, when you are forcing someone to do something, you are letting them know that you do not want their opinion, are not terribly interested in what they think about it, and don’t care about their reaction. I exaggerate only a little. Trust requires the demonstration of interest and care.
I’m sure there are many more items you could add to this list. Each situation you are facing, or goal you want to influence, needs to be weighed carefully in order to avoid losing momentum (by not forcing) or damaging relationships (by forcing in the wrong way).
With this in mind, I’d like to finish this article with some ideas for helping you to use force, when you’ve decided to do so, in the best way. Or at least, in a less wrong way.
Reducing Risks when Using Force
- Make it a deliberate decision. That means you think through each situation carefully before deciding to force an issue or decision. This avoids you forcing by default.
- Do it quietly. Force doesn’t need to be public. Making this public increases many risks, including that the target of your forcefulness will have a heightened emotional reaction because others are observing their capitulation.
- Give reasons why — always. If you’ve thought it through, you’ll have these at hand. If you haven’t, you’ll just be ordering people about. People may not want to do what you want them to do, but even a small reason why helps them to accept and be willing to do what is being asked of them.
- Balance your forcefulness. There are many different tactics of influence and force is just one. Moderate your use of force so that it is only used when absolutely necessary.
- Make consequences explicit. Force is often accompanied by an implied threat of negative consequences in the event of non-compliance. Remain objective and upfront about consequences. Alluding to problems and letting them imagine things far worse than are intended (or even possible) is unkind. Good practice to combine this with your reasons why too.
- Don’t forget the people. Everyone you work with has feelings just like you do. Roughing people up and pushing people around is going to cause harm and may get you labelled as a bully. It is perfectly possible to force someone to do something with due regard to their feelings.
- Recover the relationship quickly. No matter how hard you try, any forcefulness will weaken the relationship. If you’ve made a clear decision on a particular issue, follow it up quickly with other positive things to assure them everything is okay. Demonstrating greater regard for them on other matters will lessen the damage and reinforce your care.
The Bottom Line
Influence by force works. By all means apply a little more force, assert yourself, and accelerate your progress — just make sure to apply it carefully and balance it with kindness.
Colin Gautrey
Provocative Coach/Mentor | Specialism: Impact and Influence
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