One of the big challenges with exciting new opportunities is their propensity to hide the negatives.
While you are excited about all the new things you will be doing, the meetings you will be attending, the results you’ll be achieving, you will probably dismiss or at least downplay the drawbacks.
Once you spot the drawback, you can potentially negotiate clear boundaries, with your new (potential boss) or even with co-workers as you begin to get moving.
Here’s a quick example that had an amazing impact.
A coaching client was thrilled to have been offered a job at a European level. As we talked it through she expressed a few apprehensions about it. Several other people she knew has recently accepted similar group level roles, and were being sent all over the place, rarely at home, absent from their families – and not given any choice about it either.
They were run ragged.
Anyway, long story short, she decided to reframe from accepting the job unless they (her new boss mainly) agreed that she would spend a maximum of two nights each week out of the country.
A courageous thing to do, because she didn’t want to jeopardise the offer, but they respected her honesty, and agreed.
Three years later I bumped into her in the reception area of one of their European offices, and she told me what had happened…
So, if you are about to accept a new job ask yourself three questions:
- What are the potential drawbacks to you (and your family) if yiou say yes?
- Can you negotiate a way of avoiding or at least limited these?
- What hard boundaries are you going to insist on, or walk away from the job?
These articles may help too;
- Time to Take Control (which could be useful if you’ve already said yes)
- Getting Started in a New Job (with more links to other useful articles at this exciting time).
- What If, So What? (video to build your confidence to stand up for yourself)
- How to Upset People without Being Offensive (a quick reminder about how to deliver tough messages, make bold requests).
The Gautrey Influence Blog
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